It takes too long to talk, more than it takes to think. That delay between thoughts and letters and then sounds could be filled with more pure thoughts. That’s why we don’t think too much, because it takes too long to think about our own thoughts and express them. But the greatest time consumer is the slalom back and forward from spoken words and thought words, let alone the fact that many thoughts are lost in translation. By the time I started writing “It”, I was already thinking ten other thoughts, forgotten already by the time when I was writing “takes” and then I had to come back and artificially formulate in my brain the thought “too long”. This thought wasn’t there to begin with, it was an implant dictated by the outside logic of the spoken sentence. I say spoken, because writing is like an echo of the written sentence in my brain, which duplicate into another echo of thoughts. Is this what the quantum scientists are talking about?
Ana no 1 is thinking.
Ana no 2 is thinking of what Ana no 1 is thinking.
Ana no 3 is thinking to write down what Ana no 1 was thinking, but that’s impossible, therefore she writes about the layers of thoughts baked by Ana no 2.
Ana no 4 is thinking to speak, which is again impossible without thinking thoughts first and that cannot be accomplished because of Ana no 1 doesn’t think of thinking. Therefore how could one just think and talk without having the purpose of talking first – and this is an act that takes the pure thinking away and replace it with cup cakes.
Ana no 5 is receiving the thoughts that replicate the spoken sentence’s logic and order. She is like a waitress taking orders: 1. I thought about tomato juice, 2. I thought about thinking of tomatoes juice, 3. I thought about saying out loud I want tomatoes juice. 4. I think I don’t like the way this waitress asks me to repeat “tomatoes” juice just to get a kick out of my “tomato” accent, 5. I don’t want tomato juice anymore, but I already thought about it, so it’s a done deal. The “tomatoes juice” is already out there in the Universe, cannot be erased.
Ana no 6 is writing down under dictation from so many parallel bosses in the same time, it’s incredible she knows she is thinking of something on her own anymore. The thought exists in itself; the words exist in themselves. To make more trouble in this chaos, the waitress may be my alter ego herself.
When it would be so easy not to think anymore. Or if I chose to think, not to be aware of it – that’s where bedtime stories end and Kafka starts. ‘Cuse then I start talking and writing and there you have the words war.
Thinking of a thought being a thought-worm takes the thought away and leaves me with the worm. Then I have to draw it.